Just South Of Knowing Why
by TPianoNarwhal
Summary: Paige Matthews is depressed, she feels like she doesn't belong with her sisters, she has low self esteem, and is hiding a dark dark secret. Piper and Phoebe must help Paige cope with the struggles of life, and stop her from falling apart. Themes: Self harm, depression. Possibly more as chapters go on.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N- This story is in awareness of Madeleine Beth McCann, today marks the 7th year of her disappearance, she was only 3, nine days away from her 4th birthday. **_  
_**This is also kind of a song fic, each chapter (well most) will involve some lyrics to a song. I will try this, if you dont like it, tell me and i'll stop. (Majority Rules of course)**_

* * *

Paige settled down on her bed, her head swimming in negative thoughts, she couldn't seem to stop them. Paige was never the person to spill her heart out, not even to the closest people she loved.. her parents. Her parents are another matter. Their death was her fault, she shouldn't of argued, she should've listened, but no. Rebellious Paige had to go and ruin everything, like usual. Standing up, she trudged towards the full length mirror. Every. Single. Flaw. Reveals itself to Paige, and once seen, it pulls her under, deep down into feelings which must never be released.

Seems the only one who doesn't see your beauty  
is the face in the mirror  
looking back at you.

She slipped down the stairs, it was usual for Paige to be able to get around without anybody seeing her, she was invisible. Nobody could see her, not the real her anyway.

_Hold on,baby, you're losing it_  
_The water's high, you're jumping into it_  
_and letting go.. and no one knows_  
_that you cry, but you don't tell anyone_

She just sat there, letting her feelings engulf her into deep depression, she must've been staring at nothing for much too long, before she knew, Phoebe was shaking her.

"Paige?" She asked, a little bit too desperatley.

"Huh? What?" Paige plastered on her smile, and presented her show for Phoebe. Truth was, she acted every day, she was getting good, too good.

"I asked if you were alright. Seemed to be in your own little world there." Phoebe smiled, she sat down next to Paige, this scared her. What if she was doing that empathy stuff.

"Oh yeah. Sorry. I'm fine" Paige assured her, untucking her hair from her ear. Anything to block out Phoebe's staring eyes.

"Anything you want to talk about?" Phoebe asked, shuffling a little bit closer to Paige.

"I said i was fine. What? Did you interrogate her everytime she was upset too? Or is it just me? Do you not believe a single word i say?" Paige snapped. Standing up from her seat, she began to back away from Phoebe, who too was now stood up, her face may aswell of been painted in sympathy, but with a side coating of shock. Raising her eye brows, Phoebe asked the question that Paige wish she just brushed off.

"She? Who do you mean.. she?" Phoebe asked her.

"Nobody. It doesn't matter" Paige sighed, she couldn't wash away the tides now, she was being drowned, much too quickly. Her emotions ere arriving to shore, and she couldn't run away, she couldn't jump the wave, it was too high, to forceful.

and you might not be the golden one..  
and you're tied together with a smile but you're coming undone..

"Paige, what's going on? You know we're here for you right?" Phoebe edged closer to Paige, who looked like she was at knife's edge, she hadn't seen her sister like this before, this was not right at all of Paige, she always kept herself to herself, any problems of hers were of nobodys concern. Not that she saw much of Paige growing up, but still.

_Lies. All Lies. Don't trust the,, you're just part of the Power Of Three nothing more.. you're their half sister. Half as worthy, half as beautiful. A Half Halliwell._ Paige thought to herself, she was shaking violently now, when she finally caught her composure, she ran out the room in a cold sweat, leaving a worried and concerned Phoebe behind.

She was a Matthews, not a Halliwell, but then, she murdered her parents, she illed them in the car crash, it wa her fault they crashed. She was alone. She had nobody.

She slammed the door behind her, before sinking down against the wall. Pulling out a picture of her adoptive parents, she broke down more.

"I'm sorry. Sorry i wasn't good enough. I was rebellious. I was stupid. I love you. I didn't tell you that enough" She whispered, softly sobbing as she looked up to her ceiling, only wishing her parents could hear her. She needed someone she trusted to hold her tightly and tell her everything would be alright.

She looked around her room, even thought it was cluttered with her belongings,. it still felt alien to her, like she was an intruder. She was not supposed to be there.

A soft knock came at the door, sending vibrations up Paige's spine. "Sweetie, let me in please" Phoebe asked, she had her her head leaning on the door, waiting for a reply.

"I said i was fine Phoebe. I am honest" Paige lied.

"Im an empath. I can tell you aren't. So what's better? Talk to me, or talk to Piper? Or talk to both of us" Phoebe told her through the door.

Paige opened the door, quickly wiping away the tears that had fallen down her face. Brushing herself off, she didn't dare look at Phoebe.

Phoebe adopted her seat on the bed, then patted for Paige to join her.

"So, what's going on?"


	2. Reveal Your Inner Scars

"Phoebe, are you sure? Don't you have somewhere else to be, perhaps? I don't know" Paige desperately tried her best, on the inside she falling apart, breaking down.. but she couldn't tell Phoebe that. Phoebe would fall apart too, she cared for her sisters, but it didn't necessarily mean they cared about her.

"Yes, I'm sure Paige. What's wrong?" Phoebe asked her, begging for an answer. Paige knew full well what would happen if she said everything about how she felt.. even the deepest emotions. So, maybe summarise it? Phoebe would surely back off then?

"I just feel a bit.. lost with all this witchy stuff you know. Being new and all. I guess its taking me longer than i thought to fit in." Paige said, it wasn't exactly a lie, she did feel out of place. This witch stuff did scare her, more than she let on.

"That's normal to feel like that, we were very confused when we first became witches, it takes time, but you'll get there sweetie. I do understand how yo're feeling." Phoebe reassured her. "Look, Paige is there anything else, you've been acting really odd lately, and i'm worried about you. More than you think" Phoebe continued, Paige couldn't reply, tears were threatening to spill down her face.

"Phoebe, you wouldn't lie to me right?" Paige started, a wave of regret washed over her, hating herself immediately for asking such a vulnerable question.

"No, never. Not unless i had to. You know that"

"Do you love me? Do you.. actually care about me?" Paige asked, shutting her eyes so she didn't have to look at Phoebe's face.

"Paige, of course i do.. why do yo even need to ask? Paige, is there something still bothering you?"

"No. I'm fine. I'm going out, to get some fresh air." Paige replied, taking a a deep breath in. Phoebe was just about to hug her, but Paige flinched and pull herself away. Walking out the room she shut the door behind her, not daring to look at Phoebe.

Phoebe grabbed the phone, calling Piper who was in the car on her way home.

"Piper? If you see Paige, and she looks upset, can you bring her home? Or go for a drive around with her and talk, something is wrong with her, i know it, I'm worried." Phoebe requested, hoping Piper would be on board.

"Yeah, sure. I'll see you soon Pheebs"

* * *

After driving around for a good 10 minutes, she came across the figure sitting on some porch steps, head in her hands, alone. Much to Piper's dismay, she knew it was Paige, and Phoebe was right, something was seriously wrong.

Steeping out the car, she walked slowly towards Paige, as if to avoid startling her. "Missy Paige, been looking for you." Piper said cheerfully as she sat herself down beside Paige. "We love you Paige, you know that don't you sweetie?" Paige gave a small nod, before shaking her head forcefully.

"No. No i can't believe that" Paige ran her hands through her hair, making eye contact with her eldest sister.

"Why not?"

"I don't want to say." Paige whispered, putting her hand to her right wrist, just to make sure nothing could be seen, her wrist was burning, but it was blissful, it gave a source of release. She couldn't tell Piper that she hurt herself.. no..

"Paige, you're gonna have to sooner or later. Please, what's wrong?" Piper pleaded, even though they were newly formed sisters, and they had only just discovered their relationship, Piper still strongly believed in Paige, and strongly believed in sisters. Since Prue died, she wanted to do the same, protect sisters at all costs.

"Nothing is -"

"Don't lie Paige. Please, we just want to help you. We can't do that unless you talk to us" Piper told her, she just wanted to help Paige.

"If i told you.. you would hate me" Paige said, tears falling down her face, her voice raspy.

"No. Don't think that sweetie, we would never ever hate you"

"Trust me. I already know" Paige replied. She didn't agree with Piper, she knew everyone hated her, she was a failure, a burdern to the Halliwells, she just happened to be there now.

"Missy Paige, come here" Piper, pulled Paige into a hug, brushing her arm. Concern splashed across Paige's face when she saw her flinch and wince at the pain. "Paige, are you hurt?"

"No!" Paige jerked her arm away from Piper's prying body, panic struck she stood up.

"Let me see" Piper said sternly, knowing Paige was hurt, she needed to act as big sister and sort this.

"Its fine. I just slept on it funny" Paige told her, Piper already thought she was a screw up, she would think she was weak if she knew about Paige's scars..

"Honey, if there's nothing there, then i can look right? Please." Piper assured her, desperate to find out what was worrying her baby sister so much.

"Fine" Paige rolled up her sleeve, shutting her eyes tightly and looking away, all she could hear was sympathetic sighs, and oh paige.. "See now you know. I'm the screw up. The suicidal screw up. So, just say how disappointed you are in me, and just tell me about how you wish Prue was here instead of me" Paige sighed, speaking so quickly Piper had trouble keeping up. She was about to counter everything Paige had just said tell her everything would be okay, but before she could. Paige had orbed out.

"Phoebe, you're right, listen, can you look around the house and check if Paige is there.. she is in serious need of company, i wouldn't trust her alone. She said some things, things which would cause concern for anyone. I mean she said.. she said- she was a suic- suicidal screw up" Piper blinked back tears, had Paige really thought all that stuff about herself.

"I'll look for her now. I'm sorry, Piper we will sort this out, Paige will be okay."

"I don't want to lose another sister."

_**A/N- Please leave a review, next update will probably be at the weekend. Yesterday marked the 7th anniversary of the Coble Kids death, Kyle had just turned 5, (day before) Emma was 4 and Katie was 2. They sadly lost their lives in a car accident. **_


	3. Theories

_**A/N- I hope this update is okay, today (May 6th) Is Jack Pinto's birthday, he wouldve been 8, but sadly lost his life in 2012 due to the Sandyhook shooting, e and 25 other angels lost their lives that day 14th December 2012. **_  
_**Please review?**_

Piper burst through the door, to find a frantic Phoebe dangling a crystal over a map of San Fransico, biting her lip waiting for it to land. Only to look up at her sister, who was no pacing quickly, running her hands through her hair. Closing her eyes and sighing.

"Piper, Paige will be okay, and if she isn't we can help her. You know that" Phoebe assured her older sister, only to have Piper turn cold, spinning quickly towards her.

"How! How do we know that Phoebe? Phoebe, Paige said she was a suicidal screw up! She didn't think we cared, she compared herself to Prue! What's more, she cuts herself! Tell me how this will be okay, cause I'm not seeing it" Piper snapped, sitting down on the chair, head in her hands, only to have Phoebe wrap her arms.

"We're her sisters Piper, that's why. We can help her, she just needs to trust us, it's going to take a while for recovery, but we will get there. Together." Phoebe stroked her older sisters hair, she scrying was unsuccessful.

"I'm scared Phoebe, what if Paige ends up like Prue did, in the hands of a dark lighter taking advantage of her feelings and past. What if, she ends up on the bridge that Prue did, by the railing, getting ready to jump, just like Prue did" Piper cried, letting the tears fall, Phoebe could only sigh and hold her sister tightly.

"As you said, what happened with Prue was a dark lighter. With Paige, this is different, this isn't something we can vanquish. Paige is fighting inner demons."

"That's whats scaring me most, we can't protect her. Leo surely can sense her"

"LEO!" The pair called, wiping away their tears.

"We need you to sense her" Piper said quickly, not leaving any time for Leo to speak.

"Piper, I can't"

"What!?" Piper screeched. "Leo, what do you mean you can't sense her? Its your job to!"

"I can't sense her, she must be using something to block it." Leo shrugged, lifting his arms up waving his hands to plead guilty.

"Bridge now. So then i can at least rule that out of where Paige may be"


	4. Attempts

_**A/N- Decided to update another chapter, cause i have a plan of where this story is heading! :D please review? In the last chapter, the reference to Prue almost committing suicide was from "Murphy's Luck" Just in case anyone was wondering **_

Paige stood on the bridge, letting the wind sweep her hair, making it fly behind her gracefully, she let the tears fall down her slated cheeks as she looked down at the busy road below her, she didn't know that she was standing where Prue once had, she didn't know how much they actually cared.

_Screw Up._  
_They'd be better off without you_  
_You killed your parents._  
_You're worthless_  
_Alone_

"Alone" Paige whispered to herself, much like Prue had. She made small steps towards the railing, placing her hands on the cold bar, before looking over the edge..

"I don't see her!" Phoebe span round, taking the view around her. Bad memories were created here. She took in a breath, and erased the memory of Prue from her mind for now.

"There" Piper pointed, fear struck her intensley, and she felt like her world was falling apart. They ran up the hill, past the tree's, shouting at Paige, begging for her to get away from the edge. Leo orbed, so he stood behind Paige.

"Paige, get away from the railing, you don't want to do this. Phoebe and Piper on their way, just take my hand" He reached out his hand, realising that Paige had already climbed over, and now she was standing on a very thin ledge, so her toes could hover over the road below, she kept her hands behind her, holding onto the railing. Her head down in shame, crying so much.

"I do! That's why I'm here! Leo, get away, if you come closer i swear I'll-"

"Okay Paige. Calm down, seriously. Orb back over here"

"No!" Paige said coldly, not daring to tear her eyes away.

"Paige! Come back over this side sweetie, we can talk this through." Phoebe begged, tears spilling down her face. She stood close to Piper, staying close by Leo, staying a fair enough distance from Paige so they didn't startle her.

"Leave me alone! You don't understand!" Paige cried out, her feet shuffled on the edge, which did not go unoticed by Piper.

"Paige, we can try to. Please, I'm begging you, we don't want this, and we love you, just come back this side"

"You don't! Don't lie to me! You hate me! Cause I'll never be good enough, I'll never be as agood as Prue!" Paige started, one of the trio went to speak, but Paige beat them to it. "I'm worthless, ugly, and stupid. Nobody can help me." Paige finished, turning once and only once to face her spectators. Phoebe was now releasing muffled cries, she hated seeing her baby sister like this, so alone, and so vulnerable. Piper, she didn't know what to think, did she really think that she was just a replacement for Prue? Did she really think she hated her? Guilt rushed through Piper, which compelled her to speak.

"Missy Paige, this is not the answer. Come home, we will have a peaceful talk about this. I don't hate you, I'm here. Always will be"

A loud thud was heard, everything seemed to go in slow motion. Piper felt like her heart was being ripped, she screamed, shouting. Phoebe just collpased into tears, holding her sister crying her eyes out, she couldn't breathe. Leo just stood there, shell shocked.

"Leo! Heal her now!" Piper screamed, leaning forward onto her knees.

"I- I can't. There's too many people here. The ambulance would've been called"

"Fuck that Leo!" Piper stood up, and froze the entire scene, much to her astonishment, it worked. "NOW DO SOMETHING!" Piper screamed, Leo orbed the trio down, Phoebe was still in tears. Piper dived down next to Paige, lifting her head rocking her slowly.

"Leo, orb us to the car, I don't know how long this will last" Looking out at the frozen scene before her, she sighed. "I'm not losing another sister"

They orbed to the car, Phoebe and Leo sat in the back, Phoebe rested Paige's head on her lap, comforting Paige, cooing to her that'll everything would be okay. Leo began to heal Paige on the way, his hands hovering over her limp body, there was only a faint pulse, meaning it would take longer. Piper was the driver, wiping away her tears that were blurring her vision, she began to drive, hoping Paige would stir.

_**A/N- Please leave a review? Anything in particular you would like to happen?**_


	5. Talk To Me

_**A/N- Okay i know, this will be the 3rd update in a row. But yeah. That's good right?**_

* * *

The rest of the day was spent by Paige's bedside, Leo continued to heal her, and Piper and Phoebe watched her intensely, looking for any signs of conciousness.

"Do you think she'll be okay?" Piper asked, worry had spread inside her, and she was fearful of losing another sister. She could barely cope with Prue, if Paige died, that would be bad enough... but knowing it was her fault?

"Course, Leo is healing her. She'll be okay soon, maybe not emotionally, but we can work on that" Phoebe assured her, pulling her sister into a hug, she never held her older sister that tight since.. since Prue's death. It was devastating, and it tore the pair apart.

"Let's hope so" Piper kissed her sisters forehead, how did her little Pheebs grow to be so wise, how did she grow to be so strong.

Paige began to stir, Piper and Phoebe were so relieved to see her beautiful face, awake. Paige felt groggy, taking in her surroundings, when she remembered what happened. She began to thrash around the bed, Piper leaped for the lamp beside her bed, determined that Paige would not get hurt anymore, Phoebe sat down on the bed, trying to calm Paige down. She grabbed Paige's arms, with some difficulty.. and pinned her to the bed. then slowly let go. "It's okay sweetie, you're home, you're safe, everything will be okay. We are here for you"

"No.. no i shouldn't be here... i should be dead..." Paige cried, adopting a foetus position on her bed, burying her face in the pillows.

"No sweetie, you should be here, alive" Piper told her, sitting on the other side of Paige to Phoebe.

"WHY DID YOU SAVE ME? I WANTED TO DIE!" Paige screamed, tears streaming down her face, and her hands shaking erratically.

"Honey, we need to talk about this. We're worried about you" Phoebe told her, she went to wrap her arms around Paige, in a way of protecting her, but Paige tensed up, backing away from Phoebe's embrace.

"No. No. No." Paige stared at Phoebe, her eyes wider than distance. She hugged her knees, and sat against the bed frame, Piper just looked at her. Why was Paige so scared of Phoebe... or.. why was she so scared of a human touch?

Paige took a deep breath, she needed someone, needed somebody who wouldn't just tell her everything would be okay, but someone who was a role model. Yes, Phoebe was both, but Phoebe was more sensitive. Piper was stronger.

* * *

"Piper. Can i talk to you alone?"

"Okay, should we go, or should we stay?" Piper asked, relieved Paige was going to talk. Phoebe just nodded to Leo, and they left the room, Paige shuffled down the bed, so her feet dangled on the end, she sat next to Piper, looking down at her hands.

"I'm sorry" She mumbled, terrified at Piper's reaction.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, I know, i haven't been there for you enough, and I feel so guilty. Paige, none of this is your fault, none of it at all"

"Some of it is though. Most of it is." Paige answered

"What parts do you think are?" Piper asked, trailing Paige's hair and placing behind her ear.

"My parents.. when they died in the car crash, i argued with them. Kinda stupid really, it was over nothing, but i argued, dad turned round to say something... he didn't see the car. Next thing i knew, i was on the pavement watching" Paige stuttered, the tears threatening to spill down her face one more, she had cried so much, it ached to cry anymore.

"You mustn't blame yourself for that though sweetie, it wasn't your fault, you have to try and move on"

"How can i Piper? I killed my parents!" Paige broke down into tears, her head in her hands, Piper could only embrace her, resting her head on Paige's shoulder. "They hated me, and they would've hated me more if they found out what happened."

"What happened?"

"I- I don't wan- want to say" Paige was breaking, her cool strong façade was starting to decompose before Piper's eyes.

"Honey, you can say it."

"I was raped." Paige said at once, she just let Piper hold her, rocking her back and forth. Paige struggled to breathe, her heart pounding against her chest, her lips were wounded, speaking such a protected secret was terrifying, and dangerous. Piper calmed Paige down, whispering in her ear, Paige leaned against Piper, her head rested on her shoulder, Piper wrapped her arms around Paige, and got her to breathe with her, Paige slowly managed to catch her breath, however she still tensed at Piper's touch, at this, Piper eased a little, leaving more room for Paige so she wouldn't feel trapped.

"Can you tell me everything Paige? I know its hard, but i need to know what happened" Piper cooed in Paige's ear.

"No interruptions?" Paige requested, with the confirmation of Piper's nod, she began;

"It was one of my old foster fathers, before i met the Matthews. He hated me ever since he adopted me, so I tried to avoid him as much as possible, he always insulted me. Said i was fat, ugly worthless. Nobody wanted me. One night, i was on the phone to a friend, but i hadn't realised the time. I was up too late. He came in, accusing me of lying to him about what time i would sleep, i hung up on my friend, and tried to tell him otherwise, I have no idea how many times i said sorry. I remember, he said specifically 'so you want to stay up late?' it terrified me, he pinned me down to the bed, and tried to kiss me, i kept looking away, but he would just slap me. He took off my shirt, and started to do things.. to my breasts. I couldn't move, i was too scared to, all i remember thinking was i knew what was going to happen. He took off my trousers, and then my pants, and started to touch there too. I guess i gave up, i just lay there and let it happen, i didn't fight. So, then he started to take off his clothes.." Paige choked, tears were spilling down her face now, Piper was distraught."Then that was it. It happened, it was my fault, he always made me believe that. He told me not to tell my adoptive mother, she would hate me. I guess, i started to act out, i got rebellious, and angry, so they kicked me out. Then i lived with the Matthews, i pushed them away too"

"That was brave of you saying all that. This is not. I repeat, NOT your fault Paige, really it isnt. You wouldn't of been able to stop it, he can't get you anymore. I'll make sure of that, you did not push the Matthews away, and the accident wasn't your fault missy Paige" She held her youngest close, unable to process what her sister had told her.

"I guess you're wondering why i went to the bridge.." Paige assumed, Piper gave a small nod, giving her hands a tight squeeze, it took everything in her not to cry.

"I felt alone. With what happened to my parents, then.. that, i felt like i was intruding your lives. Prue has only just gone, and now you have a long lost sister.. it didn't seem right for me to be there."

"You are not alone Paige, and you are not a screw up either, you are anything but. I don't think I've ever met a girl just as strong as you. You're not an intruder in our lives, this family is as much yours as it is mine, just because some pathetic half separates us a bit, doesn't mean in our hearts you're not a full sister. I know, its been difficult since Prue died, and i know that's more harsh on you as you didn't know her. But we do love you, you're not just a replacement for Prue, i can tell you that now. You are our sister, and we love you" Piper assured her, still rocking her sister back and forth.

They sat in about a minutes silence, only the sound of quiet sobbing and mumbles of assurance could be heard, when Piper felt it needed to be said. "Paige, I'm going to have to search your room, and remove any sharp objects. Because cutting yourself needs to stop."

"Ok" Paige sighed, a fresh start, with now a her truth splashed all over the Halliwell sisters. "When are you going to tell Phoebe?"

"I don't think she would want me to tell her, do you think you can?Or at least e present? Phoebe would feel guilty, and i think its best if you're there anyway, you need all the support you can get"

"Okay, i guess. But I don't want to talk" Paige told Piper, wiping away the brimming tears in her eyes, Piper went to the door, and called Phoebe upstairs, leaving Paige pulling at her cardigan nervously.

This was it.

_**A/N- Please leave some feedback? The next update should be at the weekend, unless i can't handle not writing. :)**_


	6. Absent Memories

_**A/N - Got my Madeleine McCann shirt and wristbands, wear them everyday. You can buy yours at the findmadeleine store, quite cheaply. Please spread awareness of Madeleine, bring their little girl back. I'm sorry this update isn't very good, Its the holidays so i will update. Please follow my instagram for Madeleine **__** hope_for_madeleinemccannxx Together, we can reunite Madeleine with her family. Amelie and Sean will get their big sister back. **_

* * *

Paige followed Piper down the stairs anxiously, still tugging at her cardigan, keeping her head low. Phoebe and Leo were on the sofa, nervously awaiting news from Piper.

"Pheebs." Piper alerted, Phoebe span round, to find Piper and Paige hand in hand at the bottom of the stairs on looking the pair. Paige's dark eyes looked into Phoebe's, sheer terror pouring out of them, she had cried, it was obvious.

"I'll go" Leo orbed out the room, leaving a deadly silence intoxicating the air.

"Phoebe, don't react badly. What I'm about to tell you, is something that we will get through. Together" Piper eyed her little sister, Phoebe just glanced at Paige, what secret could be so horrifying that Piper lost her strength, that Paige was speechless.

"Paige's foster parents, they were a loving family weren't they. You see, there were more foster families than we thought.." Piper started, Phoebe stayed silent, not peeling her eyes off Paige once. All 3 seated on the couch, Piper holding Paige's hand tightly, reassuringly squeezing it now and then, running her thumb up and down Paige's clammy palm.

"Paige had a foster-father, who wasn't very caring, and he put Paige through some terrible ordeals. First he started.." Piper had to stay strong, tell Phoebe what happened, but it was horrible, how could she say this? one sister had already fallen, she had to make sure Phoebe wouldn't fall too. She took a deep breath in, shuffling closer to Paige, she closed her eyes, and began to speak once more. "Hitting her, insulting her. Then he.. he, ra- raped her" Piper fought back the tears that were now attacking her, Phoebe let out some tears, passing a sympathetic look to Paige, who was now hugging her knees, still holding onto Piper's hand.

"Paigey.." Phoebe whispered, she went to sit beside Paige, Piper stopped her, before giving a small nod when Phoebe sat back down.

"There's more" Piper said. Phoebe just closed her eyes, cupping her face with her hands and resting her elbows on her legs, she didn't want to hear this, the thought of her baby sister struggling through all of this by herself..

"Paige has a lot of hate towards herself. Paige, blames herself for the crash. She shouldn't, cause it wasn't her fault" Piper said the last parts, looking towards the vulnerable girl who was now leaning on her. "Missy Paige also doesn't understand just how special and important she is yet, whether Prue is alive or not, she is a bright little sister, and certainly not a replacement, and most of all. She is loved" Paige let out a small whimper at the last 3 words, pulling on Piper's arm. Piper reacted double time, pulling her baby sister closer, rocking her back and forth cooing in her ear. Phoebe just sat and cried, letting every word sink in.

"We're going to get through this together. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you Paige." Phoebe spoke up, taking her hands away from her face. Paige looked up slowly, still hugging her knees.

"Phoebe" Paige choked, cracking, she opened her arms, Phoebe instantly went into the gesture, wrapping Paige in her arms tightly, Piper joined them. The 3 sisters holding each other.

"I'll try not to cut" Paige whispered, both Piper and Phoebe lifted their heads from their baby sister's shoulders.

"That's a good start sweetie, we will help you through the entire thing"

"We will be by your side every step of the way" Piper whispered in Paige's ear, moving Paige's hair from her ear.

* * *

Piper tucked Paige into bed. "You okay, missy Paige?"

"Yep. Everything's good now" Paige smiled, but her saddened and empty look suggested otherwise.

"Paige, you don't need to lie to us anymore. If you feel sui-.. if you want to go up on that bridge again, and you want to jump. Tell me, and I'll make sure that everything gets a little better at least."

"Sorry.I guess I'm just used to hiding it now"

"That's fine, just as long as you talk to us from now on" Piper said firmly, stroking her sisters hair. Phoebe plodded into the room, in her arms a massive duvet, with pillow piled across it, you could barely see her body.

"Phoebe? What on earth are you doing?" Piper eyed her sister suspiciously, who had a smile which a child would have at christmas.

"Sleepover. I'm not leaving my little sister alone for one minute!"

"Isnt that kinda smuggling me?" Paige asked sarcastically, but a serious tone masked it.

"nope. Well.. maybe? I dunno. All i know is, I love my sister too much to let anything bad happen." Phoebe smiled, hugging her sister tightly.

* * *

_**A/N- Please review? Any advice is appreciated!**_


	7. Night Terrors

_**A/N- Don't know if the last chapter was good, if anything about this story pops up in your mind, tell me via review? Please? This chapter is slightly rushed, can you give me some ideas through review or inbox me? Any advice is appreciated**_

Paige awoke with a start, panting heavily, putting her hand to her chest, she tried to even her breathing. It was just a dream, everything is fine.. nobody hurt you. You're fine, you're okay. Paige assured herself, only to hear a small voice behind her.

"Phoebe? What are you doing up?"

"You were having a bad dream, I decided to stay awake until it passed, i tried to wake you up, but you wouldn't, you kept mumbling in your sleep sweetie" Phoebe told her, standing up from the mattress on the floor, she hobbled over Piper over to Paige.

"What was i saying?" Paige questioned Phoebe, awaiting the answer was horrible, so many dreadful things happened in her life, she could've said something that would've worried her sister even more.

"You kinda shouted, you were saying stop, and no. Then you muttered to yourself that you wouldn't open your eyes.. sweetie? Why wouldn't you want to open your eyes, you would've been out of the dream"

"He did this thing, he made me look him right in the eye, and get me to say things. To suit his 'fantasies' i hated looking him in the eye, i could just see he had a plan, what he intended to do was written all over his face. I was terrified, i couldnt look at him." Paige ran her hand down to her hair, placing the strand behind her ear.

"He's gone now, he isn't going to hurt you anymore"

"Something is going to go wrong in this family, i know it, I killed my only good family, my foster.. placement, was horrible to me, and the Matthews died. I can't ruin you guys too" Paige sighed, letting the tears fall.

"You mustn't be so hard on yourself Paige, what that man did to you was horrible, it was all him. The Matthews, you couldn't do anything about it Paige, it wasn't your fault"

"I let him hurt me. I could've orbed away or something. My parents, i should've died with them, i shouldn't of argued with them, dad would've seen the car then.."

"You didn't even know about your powers Paige, you couldn't of orbed, you couldn't have stopped it.. don't blame yourself Paigey" Phoebe wrapped her arms around Paige.

"She's right" Piper woke up, she joined her younger sisters on the bed.

"How long am i going to feel like this, Piper?" Paige asked, letting the burning tears falling down her salted cheeks.

"It's going to take time sweetie, but we are here for you, you can come to me and Phoebe about anything" Piper assured her, Paige had no idea what to say, so she just nodded.

"Paige, whar are you thinking right now sweetie?" Phoebe asked, stroking her sisters hair, awaiting an answer.

"I don't know what to think, everything is just kinda piling up right now. I just want this nightmare to end"

"By nightmare you don't mean...?" Piper asked, fearful the answer was yes.

"No, not like that Piper, i just wished none of this happened. I wish mum kept me as a child, then maybe this wouldn't of happened"

"She didn't want to, but she had to sweetie, she went against the rules, giving you up was to protect you"

"I know, but it still hurt.. Listen, i just wanna sleep now, get this night over with."

"Okay missy Paige, but if you have a nightmare, or are even the slightest bit scared, wake us up" Piper told her, pecking her on the cheek with a small kiss goodnight.

_** I know i go on about Madeleine a lot... but please keep another missing child in mind, Haleigh Cummings, she was 5 when she dissappeared in 2009, and has Turners syndrome, this child isnt as high profile as Madeleine. Don't give up on Haleigh.**_


	8. Flashbacks and Fantasies

_**A/N- Sorry for the slow updates. Please review? Sorry this is a short chapter**_

* * *

"Paige, come on get up, breakfast is ready" Phoebe shook Paige lightly, Paige woke up, groggy from her sleep.

"what?" Paige asked, rubbing her eyes as Phoebe sat beside her on the bed.

"Breakfast. Now" Phoebe began to pull Paige's arms gently lifting her off the bed, as Paige flopped side to side, still exhausted. Phoebe practically carried her baby sister down the stairs to the table, to find an expectant Piper dishing up plates.

"I'm not hungry.." Paige mumbled. Phoebe and Piper exchanged looks, their sister had been through so much, of course she wasn't in the mood to eat. "If you don't mind me, I'm going back to sleep"

"No, Paige you need to eat." Piper insisted, holding her shoulders she lead Paige to the table and sat her down, Phoebe was already tucking into Piper's home cooked heaven, Paige simply prodded at the food that was before her, she couldn't eat.

"Paige? How can you not like Piper's food? She is like a cooking queen!" Phoebe said in between mouthfuls, all Paige could do was stare blankly at the Paige.

"Sweetie, do you feel unwell?" Piper asked, placing her palm on Paige's forehead, Paige was much more pale, the dark bags she carried under her eyes weighty just like the burdens and worries she carried around everyday.

"I'm gonna go upstairs and lay down for a bit." Paige dismissed the question, quickly walking out the room with tears in her eyes. So many insults, so many threats, so many disappointments, haunting her, and the smallest triggers set it off.

Piper and Phoebe stayed downstairs for a bit, knowing Paige needed some time alone before opening up.

Paige sat against the bed crying, all the times she tried to please her foster-father, all the times she pushed the people who loved her away.. memories flooding back, a tsunami of thoughts washing through her mind.

* * *

_**FLASHBACK**_

"Daddy, i made you breakfast" 10-year-old Paige set out the plates, giving a weak smile to her father, hoping that her father maybe wouldn't hit her today. Maybe he would have sympathy, and not hit her so hard? Or lay off the insults?

Her father sat down, Paige began to bite her nails, fear overtaking her. Taking one bite, her father spat it out almost immediately.

"Are you trying to kill me now? This is poison!" He smashed the plate against the wall, shattering a photo frame of Paige at 5.

"No, I'm sorry! I didn't mean it I swear" The sentence ended quickly, his fist colliding with her face sending the little girl to the floor.

"I hope you aren't thinking of eating this shit. You're fat enough already" He spat, little Paige sat there crying on the floor, cowering, covering her face with her hands listening to her fathers vile words.

_**FLASHBACK OVER**_

* * *

Any time she tried to do something good, she got hurt, every time she did anything wrong, she would be lectured and treated like an idiot. Everything she did was wrong.

A soft voice behind Paige appeared, Paige turned round to find Piper standing there, with a sad look on her face with two hot chocolates.

"Wanna talk about it?" Piper asked, settling down beside Paige.

"Not really." Paige rolled her eyes, taking a sip of the warm hot chocolate soothing her.

"Paige, you can talk to me about anything you know that, and to be honest, I'm worried about you, every time you get distant, every time you don't open up, I'm scared I'm going to find you on that bridge again. Promise me that i won't find you doing anything like that again"

"Promise."

"Come on Missy Paige, tell me what's on your little pretty mind of yours"

"Just memories. The usual. Its nothing"

"Paige, the usual is something that shouldn't be that. You shouldn't be used to these emotions"

"I had my whole life of it. Nothing new I guess"

"Paige, things will get better, i know they will."

"So many people have told me that, and they never did, why believe it now?" Paige sobbed, Piper enclosed her baby sister in her arms, cooing in her ear gently.

"Because I'm your sister"


	9. Fading Away, Falling Apart

_**A/N- Sorry updates are even slower, and they will be a while. Holidays are over and I'm now back at school, I'm also focusing on spreading awareness of Madeleine.**_

It was the middle of the night, as darkness had swept over San Francisco, everyone had slept soundly in their beds, not a single peep from either of the sisters. Apart from the youngest, Paige.

Creeping down the stairs, she went go get a glass of water, the cool water filling the glass soon ove flowing as Paige became absent minded. Her memories creating a path leading back to her darkest times, she could still hear his voice, sending sharp threats into her ear. She could sill feel him, his rough hands running his hand up her thigh.

"No. Stop" Paige said to herself, she couldn't have a breakdown in the middle of the night could she, her sisters would find her crying like a baby in only her blue vest top, and 3/4 length trackies. She could feel her throat closing up, her hands began to shake viciously, soon her glass of water was spilling all over the floor as she struggled to compose herself. She stood there in the middle of the kitchen, begging to make the nightmares stop, she didn't want this any more.

The light was switched on, startling Paige at first. Phoebe and Piper had both come downstairs obviously hearing the commotion Paige was making, Paige was now on the floor, rocking back and forth, whispering to herself, her water all over the floor, the glass abandoned on the wet floor.

"Paige sweetie?" Phoebe stepped out of her trance, edging closer to her sister, who was now sobbing controllably. "Paige, what is it?" Phoebe asked, trying her best to sooth her little sister, Paige tried to speak, her mouth opened, but no audio-able sound came out. She was too choked up to speak. Piper too stepped closer to Paige, and down in front of her, with Phoebe on Paige's right, too kneeling, but no touching her sister.

Piper reached out, and unwrapped her baby sister's hand, pulling the object out, she decided to confront Paige. "Paige, what did you get these for?" Piper showed her sister the bottle of pills, unopened. Phoebe could only let out a sympathetic sigh, moving a strand of Paige's hair out of her face, and carefully placing it behind her ear.

Paige hadn't even noticed she had picked up the bottle, normal Paige would be perky and reply, I could ask you the same thing, but Paige was too exhausted, too drained, too depressed to even come up with a reply. Paige looked once at Paige looked once at Piper, terror and worry painted across the eldest's face. Only to divert her eyes back to the floor, she couldn't process the fact that she had almost taken them, overdosed and most likely died. Her sisters would find her dead on the floor, all because Paige was too weak to let her sister's in and help. Yes, they had made progress, but Paige was still careful about everything she said.

"He was here." She whispered, avoiding Piper's question, it didn't need an answer, they all knew. Phoebe jumped up, ready to check all the doors and windows. "Not like that, Phoebe. I could hear hi- him. I could f- feel him. He wa-was he- here" Paige stuttered, letting the tears fall even more, he haunted her everyday, and he would never ever leave her alone, as much as she begged, no matter how many times she glided a blade across her wrist, he wouldn't leave her alone.

"Paigey, he can't get you any-"

"He still does Piper, he may not be here really, but he will always be there" Paige said, pointing to her head. "And he would've always caused this" Paige pulled up her sleeve, revealing to her sisters just how many scars wee lining her arm, just how many times Paige resorted to hurting herself instead of talking to someone.

"All them times you asked me how i thought of suicide, how many times i hated myself, how many times i would fall part, blaming myself for my parent's death. Here's your answer" Paige spat, turning away from her sisters and hugging her knees.

"Hey, we are going to get through this, missy Paige, you've gone through so much, but i know you can get through this. It's over, its all over honey, its all going to be okay" Piper pulled her little sister closer, Paige tensed up, really badly. Piper's heart broke, her little sister so vulnerable, and she can't even hug her, why couldn't she take it all away? Didn't Paige feel safe with her?

"No Piper, you're wrong. I can't do this any more, its too much! I just want him out of my head, I want this all to be over!" Paige sobbed, peeling away from Piper, she enclosed her self into Phoebe's arms.

"Sssh sweetie, everything will be okay, I know right now, you hate yourself, i know right now everything is so so overwhelming, and that it feels like nothing will get better, but they will. With time, things will fade away." Phoebe cooed, Paige had continued to sob in Phoebe's arms.

"I'm sorry for being such an annoyance"

"Paige, you aren't that, you're a beautiful, bright, funny, caring little girl, you are very special. I wont ever let anybody hurt you again." Piper cooed.

"All them things you just said about me, was that before or after finding out about me?"

"Both" Phoebe assured her. "What happened to you, does not change our opinion of you, just gives us an opinion on him. Yes, what happened to you, will always be there in your life. This will never ever, make up who you are. That's a promise."

One night of breaking down, one night of releasing all of her emotions, led to her sisters breathing down her neck all the time. the string of "Are you okay" had overdosed the conversations Paige had, she just talked about her feelings all the time, or would never speak at all.

* * *

**_The Anniversary Of Her Parent's Death_**

Paige couldn't even pull herself out of be that morning, she just looked up to the ceiling, whispering things she only wanted her parent's to hear. The salty tears rolling down her cheeks, leaving her the top of her shirt and bottom of her sleeves wet.

"Maybe today, I'll join you" Paige whispered, her recent struggles through life had taken its toll, the haunting thoughts intoxicating every second of her life, the vile memories creeping its way back into her life, with the slightest trigger. Something said, or something part of a memory, that had impacted her life greatly. It was like her darkest fears, and scariest memories would shatter, and scatter all over her life, so they could remind her of her life, who she was, and who she is. The girl who got abused, the girl who got raped. Paige Matthews, the Charmed One who killed her parents. "I'll float up to the sky, earn my angels wings and be with you again, I'd say sorry, you are my parents."

Piper and Phoebe were discussing Paige over making coffee, knowing that this was going to be a difficult day for her, knowing Paige, she would put up her stone heart, deflect any vulnerable questions or heartfelt discussions. She would pretend everything was okay.

"I'm worried, she is going to hide all her real feelings, you know how she feels about her parents death, what if she attempts anything today?" Piper asked, knowing Phoebe would be able to help.

"We have a sister day, try to make her feel as comfortable as possible, don't let her hide away in her room, stay by her side"

With that, the 2 sisters climbed the stairs up to Paige's room, the door wide open. Paige would've locked it when she felt upset, or low. Obviously she was too depressed to care. She was hugging a photo of her parents, with a very young Paige with a big smile on her face. Everything she had endured, everything she had suffered seemed to almost fade away when she was with the Matthews, they loved her, and cared for her. She pushed them away, she killed them. The only people who had truly love her, were gone and it was her fault.

"Hey my missy Paige, how about we have a sister night, watch a movie or something?" Piper sat down next to Paige.

"No" Paige replied coldly, tightening her grip on the photograph.

"Paige, we know today is hard, but we are a family, we will get through this, today of all days you deserve to have people around you" Phoebe told her.

"No! We aren't family! The Matthews were my family!" Paige shouted, immediately regretted what she had said, she had told the Matthews they weren't her parents, when they were. They were there to hug her when everything fell part, they kept trying to help even when Paige was drowning her sorrows in alcohol. Now she had just done the exact same thing to her sisters. How could she? No wonder nobody wanted her. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean that! Please!" Paige cried, burying her head in the pillows, hitting the side of her fist on the mattress over and over. Phoebe moved in front of Paige, while Piper soothed her, rubbing circles on her back.

"Hey sweetie, we know you didn't mean it. So do your parents" She gently grabbed hold of Paige's wrists, she could feel the roughness of her baby sister's pain, as the scars met her skin.

Were things ever going to get better? It felt like they never were going to. Paige could feel the urge coming, she needed to cut. She had to end it.

"Phoebe, i want to join mum and dad, let me go" Paige didn't mean the let me go as in her wrists, she meant her life, Phoebe let the tears fall as Paige basically asked her if she could commit suicide.

"Sweetie, in time, we'll see if you can see them. The elders could allow your parents to visit you for a while. It would take some persuasion. But, if it means that you won't hurt yourself, I'll do anything"

"I want them to know I love them, that i didn't mean what i said" Paige sobbed, her last words to her parents were horrible. She needed that to change.

"They already know sweetheart" Piper continued to rub circles on her back.

"I need to say it to them"

**_A/N- Super long chapter, to make up for the fact i won't be updating for a while, sorry._**


	10. Façade

_**A/N- Sorry I haven't updated in ages, GCSE's are stressful, completed two maths mocks, been so busy! please review? I'll probably update more of my other stories tomorrow :)**_

Paige sat there, rocking bath and forth in her bedroom, the salty tears still streaming down her cheeks, days like these, made her wonder why she didn't jump off the bridge sooner. Flinching as footsteps crash against the staircase, ascending up to her bedroom. She was terrified, the slightest noise scared her.

_**FLASHBACK**_

_His heavy boots slammed against the wood, as he stormed up the stairs, his harsh voice shouting cruel words at her. "Look at what you gone and done Paige! You got me fucking fired!" Soon after, his fist met her face, leaving only bruises and the sounds of weeping of a girl cowering in the corner of her bedroom._

_**FLASHBACK OVER**_

She shook her head in effort to shake off the memory, sadly it never worked. It was always there in the back of her mind, what happened, what he said, how it made her feel. He was always there, stalking her thoughts.

Phoebe had lately taken to the courtesy of spending more time with her youngest sister, Piper - being the brilliant cook she is - was making more home cooked meals, and would serve them to her in bed, and would always ask, "Do you wanna talk?" every single time, Paige would lightly shake her head, rejecting Piper.

They weren't always nice to her though. Rumor spoke with sharp tongue, stabbing Paige with each word. Talking behind her back.

"I'm worried about her Piper, she is so distant, all she does is sit there, she hasn't spoken in days."

"I'm worried too honey, I tried to get her to talk to me, she never wants to"

"We just need to give her some-"

"Don't you dare say time Phoebe. We can't keep giving her time if she isn't going to make progress. She can't stay silent forever"

They were right, Paige couldn't stay silent forever, at one point or another, her sisters would make her spill, and that would end in one big blubbery mess of tears. Paige could not show her real feelings, no. She was weak, and that meant letting her father win.

2 choices, either end it. Put a stop to this mad mad cruel life, or put up a façade. Or the third option, talk.

* * *

Paige looked up to the sight of her younger sister poking her side.

"Paige. Are you okay?"

"What? Me? Yeah, I'm good." Paige plastered on her smile, hoping to please Phoebe. She had decided, the façade would work best, she could not give up too easily, her father would win, and to be honest, she was scared. Talking to her sisters, it was slowly killing her. They always said they would be there for her, no matter what, no matter when. She could see the hurt in their eyes, how tight they held her. It was her fault they had been put into such a vulnerable position.

"Paige, I'm being serious" Phoebe gave her a firm look, then knelt down, furrowing her eye brows almost as if she was scavenging for Paige's true feeling, delving deep into the depths of Paige's emotions.

"So am i" Paige said, giving a small laugh, hoping that would just encourage Phoebe to believe her. Phoebe wasn't budging.

"Don't bottle things up Paige, it isn't healthy. You can talk to us, I'm here right now, to listen"

yeah right, Paige thought. "I really don't need to talk, I'm doing just fine." Paige's icy blue eyes looking into Phoebe's concerned brown, they gazed into hers for a few seconds, when Phoebe finally stood up.

"Okay, but the moment you feel even the slightest bit worse, you come and find me or Piper. Ok?"

"Okay" Paige replied, i won't need to g to you then, as i really don't see how i could feel any worse than i do now..


	11. Exposed

_**A/N- Hi, this will be a fairly short update, if you're reading please please review? then i can get some ideas! It was Allison Noelle Wyatt's birthday yesterday, she would've been 8, Allison was an aspiring artist, often covering the walls with her drawings, she performed random acts of kindness, offering her fish crackers to a random person on an aeroplane. Instead she is forever 6, after she died along with 19 other children and 6 of her teachers at Sandy Hook Elementary on 14th December 2012. Sweet dreams little angel, you paint the sky with stars...**_

Paige would never tell Phoebe how she was really feeling of course, the moment the words of truth spilled out of her mouth, she would suffocate in their care, it would make her feel guilty. She had enough to deal with.

Piper walked down the hall, a hand full of clothes settled in her arms, she slowly and cautiously walked down to Paige's room, careful not to trip from the clothes that were obscuring her view. It was a normal day, Paige was in her room until the late hours of the morning, Phoebe alike. Piper, who was following in Prue's footsteps, got ready early to greet her sisters in their tired state. She opened the door to Paige's room, but when she saw it. She could only stand there in shock, it was like she couldn't move, couldn't breathe. All she could do was stare. She knew about Paige's abuse, but had never seen the extent of it. It broke her.

The vulnerable girl stood, only in a black bra, and some black leggings, she had a white long-sleeved shirt in her hand, she was obviously in the middle of getting changed. Her neutral self had turned into a state of horror, she span round, stared at Piper for a minute, letting it sink in that Piper had seen.

Piper continued to stare, looking in detail at every bruise and laceration that had coated Paige's torso, "Wh-" Piper started, only to be cut off by a heart wrenching cry.

"GET OUT! GET OUT!" Paige screamed, running to the door to slam it, Piper left immediately, it was the only option she had. She just stood outside Paige's door, the laundry still in her arms, as she heard sobbing on the other side of the door. Phoebe dozily walked over to Piper.

"Hey.. what's with all the screaming?" She asked, rubbing her eyes, slouching, she leaned against the wall, waiting for Piper to explain. Nothing. She stepped forward and took in Piper's expression. She was crying, she was so scared. "Piper, what's going on? Is Paige okay?"

"No.. Paige, she has so many bruises, so so many. She freaked out, i haven't seen her like that before. We are her sisters, we should be in their now talking!" Piper said through the everlasting tears. They were now making the clothes wet, as Phoebe dried her eyes, they both made an agreement.

"You go to the kitchen and prepare something, so when she comes downstairs, she can get some food in that system of hers. I'll try to talk to her, I haven't seen her bruises, so she might be a bit more open about it, how does that sound?" Phoebe asked, removing a strand of Piper's hair from her eyes. All Piper could do was nod, as she continued to dry her eyes, she walked down to the kitchen, leaving the clothes in a pile upstairs.

Phoebe slowly opened the doors, to find Paige in the corner of the room, her bed sheets wrapped around her tightly, her hair damp from the sweat, the tears.

"Leave me alone, it was just demon stuff, you know?" Paige defended, of course it wasn't, they both knew the answer.

"Paige, why can't you just let it in? Please, talk to me, tell me what's wrong" Phoebe persisted, she had to admit, she was physically and emotionally drained.

"It was a demon! I swear!"

"Leo would've healed you, Paige, we both know. Please, lets not pretend anymore. You don't have to show me, just.. talk" Phoebe sat down next to Paige, she too enveloping herself in a blanket.

"You already know where they are from, so why are you here?" Paige moved away from Phoebe, her eyes starting to form with tears, such a vulnerable question, Phoebe could ask so much of her sometimes.

"Paige, you bottling things up, pretending, Paige, you aren't the same person anymore, you're depressed all the time now, and you wont talk to me or Piper. That scares us, because you're slowly killing yourself, and we don't want to lose you!" Phoebe snapped, her eyes streaming with tears. Paige was used to this, people having a go at her, for anything, in desperate times of need, or just because they hated her. There didn't need to be a reason, Paige just stared at her with blank eyes as the tears fell freely down her cheeks. But the next 5 words seemed to stab her, they kicked her when she was down. "Not like we lost Prue"

"That's the thing, I'm not Prue! I won't ever be! And what the fucking hell, i may as well be, because it seems like my life revolves her, Prue this, Prue that! I'm not her, I' not the Charmed One Prue was, I don't belong!" Paige shouted

"Paige..." Phoebe started, walking forward slowly towards her younger sister.

"No! Stop! Maybe, if i just kill myself, me and Prue could stop. The Elders wouldn't let the Charmed Ones die, they'd need to bring one of us back, and Prue is better, Prue is perfect" Paige spat, hugging herself tighter, moving away from Phoebe.

"No Paige! Don't you dare, we won't let you, please I'm begging you, tell us how you're feeling!"

"Really Phoebe? You haven't caught the hint!" Paige shouted, Phoebe mentally slapped herself for asking such a stupid question.

"Then tell me what you're thinking now" Phoebe sat down beside Paige, as she settled down beside her, Paige didn't fight, or move away. She was too tired. She didn't even care anymore.

"I want everything to end, every time i close my eyes, he is there. I can't escape, there is no plot twist in my story, so i just have to try to end it." Paige looked into Phoebe's hurt eyes, as much as she hated to be around her sisters now, she didn't want to intentionally hurt them. "Hey, we all know that in a god story, the main character dies" Paige gave a small giggle, but Phoebe didn't return it.

"Paige, what else did your foster fath- i mean, your foster placement, do to you?"

"Nothing that you already know, I'm fine"

"You say you're fine Paige, but i know you better than that. It's so obvious that you're not fine, please, we're sisters"

"Fine, maybe i believe it when people tell me I'm worthless, and maybe i do compare myself to Prue all the time, every single day i have to live with the guilt of killing my parents. That's a summary" Paige looked down, avoiding the watchful eyes of Phoebe's.

"I don't want a summary Paige, i want the full story"

"I don't want to talk. Please just go"

"Fine, but from now, we're writing a sequel, your story isn't finished. We're going to make a story about your recovery and happy ending"

_**A/N- Not a great chapter.. need some ideas, please review?**_


End file.
